Homie Don't Play That part 2 or Last time on #TBT

Well this is part one.

So July of this year, I hadn't quite forgotten the incident of last year but it was in the far back of my mind.  I headed out to the bar, who knows quite why this evening.  I do remember being done we were on our last beer it wasn't even close to closing time.

Suddenly a guy walks up beside me. "Hey, your Kirby, how ya doin!" Hmm the first person I'd run into at the bar who knew who I was. It's understandable I'm a radio guy and go out to a few events but most people just know me by my voice.  I was thinking cool he seemed really glad to see me. "You don't know who I am do you"

"I'm the husband" shit "you're thinking oh shit aren't you"  I was.  Leaving in little over a month I didn't want this.  I finished my beer grabbed my buddy told him it was time to go.  He apparently didn't get my sense of urgency as he stayed inside for a few minutes after I headed out.

The husband followed me out, with the typical trash talking about running away etc.  Well for starters I had said I was done before he showed up.  But I mean yeah he didn't help things and I'm sure it made him feel all so proud.  I also had no ill will towards the guy.  It wasn't a personal diss on him that I flirted with his wife, I hadn't know.  A fact I was still trying to point out when the chest bumping started.  At this point my buddy had come out, his were still inside and telling him to come back in.  I'm not necessarily a small guy but he made me look small, tall and... Not muscular.  He at this point was getting to close for comfort and I could tell he wasn't going to be quicker than me.  He was already leaning on my left arm, so I just extended it giving myself enough space for a right to connect if necessary.

This is not how it would have looked.

For those of you expecting an exciting conclusion it doesn't happen.  I started walking back he stood trash talking.

The End.




I really hope you didn't fall for that.  I get home annoyed adrenaline pumping, I get a text message.  Well I won't be sleeping anytime soon.  It's her.  Really?  Who keeps the number of someone they knew for about a week a year ago.  I mean as the husband when this went down wouldn't you kind of insist on seeing it deleted?

He'd texted her about the evening, so she felt the need to text me.  I was angry, drunk, and full of adrenaline. She picked up right where she left off also, asking if she could come over the next day.

I don't recall what I said but it was sufficient.

The screw it you know it's not the end.  The following week she text me again.  I explained I'd be leaving soon moving to California, and so I wasn't looking for anything permanent (I mean most women would go running away from that) "well I could go with you"

Really!?? like that's psycho.  At this point I tried flat out insulting her.  "You don't have enough money to go on this trip with me" well that was not a deterrent at all, ex-husband, kids, etc be damned.  "Well I'd make sure to earn my keep... any way you can think of"

Wow just wow.  At this point I just started ignoring the texts.

Fast forward a week.

I pulled the baseball bat out of retirement and headed for the fair.  The husband never showed.  She did, I gave her some tickets in the hopes that would get rid of her.  Nope.  She hung around for around an hour trying to get me to go home with her both co-workers stopping her at every turn.  Oh well we've got to do this and I thought we were doing that after work etc.  Finally her Uncle stopped by and got in an argument with her.  I assume cause she was trying to get it on with the guy that revealed to her husband the marriage was kinda shot.  But still it wasn't enough to stop her completely I got another text that night.

That was it and now the solution is so clear I feel like a dumbass.  I'd recently gotten a new phone, the new phone has a spam filter.

Finally peace.  I leave by Friday so unless she does some serious stalking I'm safe forever.

Living Life on Hold 2

So my bags are packed todays the day.  Well it was supposed to be, but the universe likes to torture me test the strength of my heart physically and mentally.  Thursday I filled up the gas tank, I remember thinking that with as little driving I'd have to do over the next week most of that gas would be used on the trip.

Friday I walked behind my car and could help but smell gas.  My heart immediately sank this is what happened with my civic.  I smelled gas and found out the my gas tank was coming apart at the seam, it'd actually been hitting the muffler we had to replace the entire fuel system in that car.  I begrudgingly looked under my Mustang.  I noticed some seepage where the fuel line goes into the tank.  I busted out a google search and noticed that it's quite common on an 01 Mustang for the Fuel Filler Grommet to deteriorate. I went and bought the part that day.

It was a $20 part so I stopped by the closest Autozone and bought it.  I asked my Uncle (family mechanic) to check things out I'm not really into cars like him and I wanted to verify my deduction was right.  But no such luck I got blew off.  Well I quickly researched how to replace the part seemed easy enough.  Honestly it was pretty easy.  One small problem though.

The Fuel Filler Neck was also rusted all the way through.  I spent several hours trying to locate the part locally but nobody keeps it in stock and Junkyards don't tend to be open on Sunday, especially the Sunday before Labor day.  You'll notice in the photo it looks like someone shoved a garden hose in the pipes.  That was me.  The hose just fit in the pipe I needed to be able to get gas right?

Even now this fix looks like it should have worked to me.  I used some seal all on it I figure the hose inside connects the two sides allowing gas to flow the sealant would prevent spillage.

Luckily I suspected that it wouldn't be full proof the next day I put some gas in the tank, when I say some I paid for 16 cents and think that maybe a penny went into the tank.

I've now ordered the part via Amazon and it's slated to arrive no later than Friday at 6pm. A bit unfortunate as I vacate my apartment tomorrow, but at least its on the way and the delay isn't as long as it could have been.

I will say this about the ordeal it's a bitch to plan and plan and plan, only to be delayed through no fault of your own.  But as I can attest to (especially as of late) you gotta roll with the punches.

Homie Don't Play That or Homie Don't Play That #TBT

For the past 6 years I've been a Radio DJ/Engineer for a station in Athens, Ohio.  Being a DJ can be incredibly fun most of the time.  This story is not inspired by one of those times.

August 8 2013 - I was assigned to work the fair, I'd liked doing it in the past so I had no problem telling my boss to let me do it again.  I was also training Lorenzo, a fella I'd known for a few years, on how to run station equipment and find his "radio voice".  Working a fair is a brilliant time for a DJ everyone wants you to do a favor for them, talk about their stand in return free food, play their song in return well nothing in return really but you'd give them six seconds of joy before the inevitably walk away.

There are three downsides.  The first, never start a landwar in Asia.

The second you will constantly get his on by girls under the age of whatever you deem the appropriate age to be hit on.

The third everyone is bat shit crazy.

Another problem is contests.  The people want what you got, even if it's something horrible they'll do anything to get it, that includes standing at the booth for 7 hours straight.  This night a woman approached the first one in the age range that was deemed acceptable to be hit on.  How'd she look you ask?  Honestly that first night I couldn't have told you.

See I had my sunglasses on.  Yes, sunglasses at night.  It was so I could, so I could look wherever I wanted or take a nap without being judged.  Lorenzo and I, or Lolo as he liked to call himself had already given all the tickets away for the evening but this women really wanted them she sat there talking to us for at least an hour playing with the buttons on her shirt.  It was nice finally someone our age, but the night was over and we left.


August 9 2014 - Early in the afternoon the weather had been horrible 80 plus degrees and then about halfway through the afternoon, a storm like you wouldn't believe lightening struck at one point and left that smell, the same smell when you start a small electrical fire at the radio station and just sit their desperately hoping it'll catch and burn the place down but doesn't, it smelled like that.  The rain had cut the temperature in half that night instead of getting hot and muggy it got cool real cool too cool.  The woman came back up earlier that day.  She wore something even more low cut the day before, I didn't think it was possible but she'd pulled it off.  Lorenzo could barely contain himself in the back.  She was one of those women that liked to be looked at so this time I took the sunglasses off.  She won the tickets.


She wasn't a dame to die for but she was better than the 15 year olds that had been hitting on us.  Lorenzo had driven that night, I'd gotten jammed up and my car was taken away, somehow Lorenzo let this all slip.  She offered me a ride home but Lolo and I had to go back to the station, we still had work to do.

Time ticked away like rain tapping on the windshield of the car I couldn't drive.  One night I get this message on The Facebook.  It was her, I don't know how but she'd found me, like Marty I should've run but I didn't.  This broad was throwing herself all over me, it was different usually I wasn't the mouse in the cat and mouse game of relationships.  Things progressed I gave her my number we started texting.  Then she started begging for it.  Yes that it.  Not even slightly exaggerating after two days of texting she was asking me to meet up for sex, my spidey sense would be going off the charts, well they would if I'd been bitten by a radio active spider and in doing so absorbed it's powers.  She started sending nudes and going down a very distinct style of text messaging.  It'd been a month since the fair and are third day of texting when the bells in my head did finally start to go off.  I knew nothing about her, very quickly she took things off of The Facebook and onto the text message.  I looked up her profile, two kids... Kids where was the dad?  It was difficult to figure out I finally figured out who the kids grandmother was because she'd been uploading the pictures.

She was his mother.  The husbands mother. As in STILL MARRIED.  If only I'd been a Detective in one of those Noir films the ones where they talk funny in the narration, over expressing some of the details relating things to things that didn't matter, and using commas, where they didn't quite fit, if I'd been that guy I'd have realized all the warning signs were there she was married.

Homie don't play that, I told her it was over, I'd known people in this situation before, not happening.  She boohooed about how he was a douche and she was leaving him when she got the money together for her apartment.  I expressed my kudos if that's what she wanted she should go for it, but I was done like the end of a midnight cigarette.  She'd thrown herself at me hard, I was proud that my head had won out.

THE END

Wait what?

Midnight The Night I called it off -  It was actually past midnight closer to 3am when the phone rang, I dislike talking on the phone, so many ums and uhs, you cut that out most of my calls would be 3 minutes, they never are.  It was her number, what the hell did she want, why the hell did I answer?  I suppose it was to tell her off one last time get it into her head it was done, I dunno why I answered.  When I did it wasn't her voice, "I'm going to fuck you up, she's my..." I don't remember what he said a lot about kicking my ass,  most of it actually his buddies would kick my ass.  This man was a moron, I could tell from the start, now I don't blame him for being angry, I'm sure I would be too,  but the anger seemed misplaced like all the items next to the price checker at Walmart. He was mad at me, I'd never touched his wife, sure she'd sent me some photos and made some suggestions of what I should do "when we met" but we never had, in fact as soon as I found out about him I called the whole thing off, which I told him, repeatedly.  I made one last appeal trying to explain my side of the situation, but no luck.  He said he was going to beat me up at the station, "beat you up" his own words like we were back in high school.  I told him that he couldn't do it at the radio station it's a felony, as a broadcaster if he beat me up he could coerce me into in-sighting a panic, I think some politicians should take a look into this theory, but it was made up more creative than a dime store novel.

Weeks turned into Months, I'd strategically placed a ball bat in case he or his friends ever decided to show up. As promised I'd never had contact with either of them again.

Until...

Tune in next week for the exciting conclusion next week.


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The Road So Far

I've done something similar to this post so far and this is one of those cathartic things.  I normally don't like to brag, at least not in a way that isn't somewhat comical.

But my decision to move to LA has been one of the hardest in my life.  Not for the reasons you might think.  I'll miss my family and I don't want to belittle that but we're at a point we're all headed different directions.  My brother is in his second year of College, so most of the time he's away.  My dad owns a business in Tennessee, which causes him to travel to and fro.  My sister lives about 30 miles away and we've just gotten to a point it's more common for us to talk through Facebook or text.  I'll miss them.  But that is not the way the decision has been difficult for me.

I'm not quite sure when I made the decision to move, I honestly think when I enrolled I was hoping that was what I'd do.  Surely by the time we got back last year from LA it was done.

But back in February I knew that I wouldn't be facing another Ohio winter.

So then I started saying May, MAY MAY MAY MAY MAY.  That's when I was leaving.  Well why not May. Well I had a lease to contend with, I thought simple enough I'll find a sub-leaser or someone to replace me.  NOPE.  Turns out my rental company doesn't allow that it'd be $1,000 to break the lease.  Not something I exactly wanted to pay but damn it maybe I should.  These are my dreams, my future, my happiness and well being we're talking about.

Then a shit storm it in March.

My identity was stolen, some guy in Bulgaria decided he wanted to use my paypal account to drain my bank account.  Now it was caught and caught extremely fast by me I'd been watching the account for some reason, I think I was waiting for a transaction to go through for the trip.  I got all of my money bank also.  What happened as a direct result and really screwed me over were all the late fees and overdraft fees that were a result of this.  My bank account was sitting at just over $2000 before.  I got that money bank.  I had to pay rent, utilities and I'd charged some things to my bank account.  My rent is 675 my utilities ball parked in around 130.  I had a late fee from everyone and anything I'd charged to the card when the money was taken was given an over draft fee.  When it was all said and done I had $75.

I was crushed.  Completely done.  Not a chance of leaving in May.

That left three months to make back and more to get what I wanted to make for my new start.  But first I had to finish College with less than a month to go my advisor meets with me.  He proclaims that I may not have enough credits to graduate due to some class that may no longer count, though at the beginning of the semester it had.  So for three weeks I'm constantly worried about having to find money to take classes in the summer, or do I get an internship in LA make that count and move out anyway?  How do I handle this if it goes south?  It never got to that point I passed all my classes and as originally thought I graduated.

Crisis adverted anxiety gone.

Uh Uh.

What's one of the most important things a person needs?

Around this time mine chose to fall apart.  The linkages stopped working it rolled across a parking lot.  I took it in and it need a new transmission in addition to the rest.  $1800 worth of repairs.  A month and a half of worrying.

After my monetary issues I decided to take on a second job.  It was supposed to be part time.  It became full time and while I enjoyed the people I worked with after two months and stress on top of stress on top of stress I had to go.

Now lets not forget the nay sayers in all of this.  Those people that don't understand the desire.  They don't understand because they can't seem to believe the sacrifices some people are willing to make for change.

They have to ask are you sure?  Well, huh why would you do that?  What makes you think you can make it?  Don't you think you should wait?

I've made the decision, it's mine to make if you'd like to help kudos if not butt out.  Those people get me the most, it seems as if they're concerned and if they are thanks but why not do something helpful?  Like for instance "Hey do you want me to map it out?" or anything thats constructive.

Now I'm on the living situation.  I was expecting it to be a two person venture, now it's a one.  Not a big deal just another unexpected change.  Still looking for a place but it's 75% Females only 10% Gays Only and 15% must have proof of income.  Where do the people that are just getting started go?  I have friends out their but they all seem full up.  The places they live in are two small or they're already staying with friends of friends.  Every time I get a lead something happens and I get slapped back down.

Further monetary setbacks mean I'm leaving slightly under my intended budget.  Things selling for way under what I had thought.  People owing money promising to pay me just before or after I move.  Other just blatantly lying or ignoring me.

Now this blog isn't meant as a pitty party.  It's motivation.  Look what I've overcome so far.

I endured.  I'm going to LA it's 6 days away.  And I'll do whatever it damn well takes to stay.

The Decision

So at one Point I was going south looking across the desert hitting up Winslow Arizona and Rosewell.  Then it was north Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone and Big Sky Country.  Then I toyed with the idea of looking across the cornfields of Kansas driving over the Rocky Mountains.

I'll still listen to this song though.

The decision is....

I'm taking my alternative route, St. Louis to Denver, The Grand Canyon driving through Las Vegas (unless anyone wants to hook me up with a hotel then I may sleep their) and onwards to Los Angeles.

I'm not an outdoorsy guy, Mt Rushmore would be great to see but I feel like it's probably really not much more than I've seen on various TV Shows and Movies (like I'd get there and my response would be "yup that's it") Yosemite is similar I mean what happens when I arrive and ole faithful has already blown it's load?  Sure I get to drive through one of those big ass trees but I really don't want to invest the time in hiking around the woods alone

And while I assume St. Louis to Denver is likely to be pretty dull, won't the northern route also?  I mean in between the Mississippi and the Rocky Mountains their really doesn't seem to be much of anything to look at because it's all flat and its all farm or dirt.

This route was also chosen purely because of money.  I need it more for LA than for seeing the country.  I've got to find an apartment and as you've already read that search isn't going that hot so far.

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P.S. Someone pointed out the whole Montana thing didn't workout for my favorite Lonesome dove character Gus.

The next Problem

This is not where I'll be staying.  As a matter of fact, I have no idea where I'll be staying.  I've been looking since the beginning of August.  At first I was looking for a two bedroom me and my friend Steve were going to move out, me on September 3rd and then he was going to join me in October once he got laid off from his job.  I'd get us a two bedroom he'd throw in on deposit etc.  Not long ago his boss made mention of keeping him on until November.  So Steve is out, at least for now I don't know what his future holds.

So now I'm looking for a completely different type of place than I originally expected.  Be it a couch, a 3 month lease or something more long term.  A one bedroom by myself is out of the question I'd like to find some people to stay with.  Everyone I know is either too comfortable (they have no need to look for a new place)or too packed (they already have so many people they can't take anyone else).

Now I'm sure eventually I'll find a place to stay my huge concern is the period when I first get there, where do I go, I really don't want to pay for a temporary place 2-3 weeks, that's money I could be using when I do find a place right?

I'm half tempted to live out of my car if I can't find something.

Not exactly spacious.  But thankfully mine is fabric.

I really just haven't got a clue,  I know it's not common to move out without some place to stay even if not just temporarily, but everyone I can think of is full up.  I suppose I should stop writing and jump back on Padmapper or one of the various other networks I've been using.

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Hall of Pain #TBT

As should be aparent from some of the #TBT's I'm a wrestling fan, though lately I've not been able to keep up.  Back when I had more of a disposable income I used to go several events a year.  I've sat all over the buildings and it's not worth it unless you're within the first 5 rows of the floor or lower bowls.

This particular story took place on a Monday Night Raw back near 2004.  I typically go with one of two cousins as we were this particular evening. The event was in Cleveland Ohio which is 200 miles one way.  We arrived around 4 or 5 in the afternoon, we'd never been to a show in Cleveland and had no idea how long it'd take to arrive.  Unfortunately the gates didn't Open till 7.  We decided to go to the Rock N Roll hall of fame.  All I remember about it is that we weren't their early enough for the entrance fee to be worth the short amount of time we'd have to spend inside.

Annoyed we began to walk around the city, a city that smelled like crap.  I don't know if we picked the wrong day or what but no matter where we went the strong odor of crap filled my nostrils, it was not pleasant.  Also no matter where we were the wind was right in our faces, we'd deliberately make turns to get out of the wind with no luck at all.  Finally we entered the arena.

Now often before Raw is shown on USA live they'll tape some matches for other lesser shows or just have some matches to get the crowd ready.  This particular night they had a match that was not aired.  Mark Henry vs. some guy trying out to get a job.

He's a big guy and at this time he was playing the bad guy.  My cousin and I had paid a fair amount to have ramp seats (along the wrestlers entering).  The guys behind us were being assholes, we were all of 15 minutes into the event and they'd already gotten on our nerves, bumping into us, yelling stupid stuff just to annoy whoever walked by etc.) Mark comes walking up the ramp and we were near the back of the ramp so we look over and we are at foot level (Some of the divas should take into account these seats when deciding what they wear when not wrestling)  The guys behind us hold out this huge tray of nachos (I was amazed at the size thinking they had to have charged like $30 for that thing) they yell at Mark "Hey loser maybe you should eat something" (intelligent) 

This is the exact look he gave.

I don't even know how I saw it coming all I remember is that I stood perfectly behind my cousin who was bigger than me. Mark kicks the nachos out of their hands it nails my cousin, i got a few  stray bits of cheese but nothing horrible.  My cousin however was drenched, his jersey ruined.  The clowns were thrown out, we explained to the guard they weren't with us and they had been asking for it (they thought we were together for some reason). So far this is how everyone should have reacted.

We asked the guard for a shirt or something, after all my cousin was covered.  We'd just driven 200 miles.  No Shirt.  What about a towel.  No Towel (we were never told why).  Now this is starting to slide into the rude section. Then every Heel (bad guy) wrestler that came out would look, point and laugh, including the owner of the WWE Vince McMahon who with his son Shane actually stopped walking down to take a minute to point an laugh really soaking it up.  

The owner of the company was aware of our plight.   Every time they cut to commercial they aired the whole thing on the screen.  I'd been cool with this if we'd gotten a damn towel.  We'd done nothing to deserve to be the laughing stock of everyone.  We pleaded with the guard once more about a shirt or towels, he informed us we could by a shirt for $30 at the souvenir stand.  My cousin had to use napkins and he was fairly soaked in Nacho cheese.   

It was funny and makes for a good story, it certainly helped Mark Henry get over as a bad guy that night.  I just wish that after it was all said and done we'd have gotten at least enough respect for a towel.

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