Now I'm sure a few people out there are going to be like "you're just hitting on them just to get laid?" well I would be but I'm not. I'm gone in 70 days. If friendship happens so be it but is their really a point in trying to get more before the move? I'm not interested in any single serving friends.
The problem is I'm deathly afraid of the worst case scenario. Something happening preventing my move. My car is already having issues (going in the shop today) One night stand leads to a pregnancy, or hell even worse love. I'm not staying. In the last two scenarios it'll lead to resentment, hate and the dark side.
I've no problems putting life on hold, it's somewhat been like that for the past 6 years. Most of my closer friends have lived over 70 miles and very rarely would they visit. If I happened to have a car at the time I'd drive the distance and visit. Now I wasn't so wrapped up in school that I didn't make friends here but most of them graduated in May when I did and they've moved away. Have I had any one night stands? A few. Nothing became of them. Did I have anything close to a girlfriend? Not really before coming down here I went through an emotional roller coaster and closed myself off to that type of connection. Now I find myself ready for a connection again, but I find my goal more important and the time frame I've set counter productive.
I do find myself having one last hurra with most of my friends so that's fun and different, the friends I do have and I are going to share some incredible moments in these final weeks.
It's not just friendship on hold. Spending I can't buy that movie I'd otherwise consider. I sit in an empty apartment watching everything via my laptop because I'm selling off all my things. I'm not buying... Anything clothes (who wants to take more), electronics (just more potential breaking). Nothing new is happening and I'm OK with that. for the next 70 days. On day 71 everything changes.
As always Like Click Share
No comments:
Post a Comment